Rebel Without A Cause: My Threenager

The other day I read an article about living with a "Threenager".  Are you living with a threeanger? There were 10 tell tale signs to help you decide.
- Yes, I live in constant fear of cutting up her sandwich the wrong way.  Of giving her the wrong colored cup, the wrong plate or wrong colored utensil.
- Yes, we go through multiple wardrobe changes in one day.   Every morning I dread getting her dressed, will she accept the outfit choice for the day without having a full blown tantrum? I know my desire to dress her warmly in freezing cold weather is baffling to her.  Clearly I make poor outfit choices.   Same goes for shoes, headbands, barrettes, coats, you name it, my pick is WRONG! I do let her have options by the way, the problem is the only acceptable options for her are pjs (the monkey dress pjs to be exact), princess outfits, and her stinky purple shoes.

Who is this tyrant that makes me live in fear? My full of sass, cute as a button three year old who loves nothing more than to cuddle and whom I am completely in love with.  SOME OF THE TIME.  I won´t lie, a lot of the time I want to pull my hair out.  I want to go the bathroom, lock the door and wait until she turns four.

We went thru something similar with my oldest, but not in the same way.  Her rebelliousness was best described as the terrible three´s, as it was a continuation of the terrible two´s.  Tantrums, trying to get her way, wanting to wear the same outfit all day everyday...similar to threenager behavior, but without so much drama and a lot less attitude.  Challenging nonetheless but not as exhausting.  Once she reached four it was smooth sailing (most of the time).  How quickly one forgets, and how quickly you get used to the easiness that comes with them getting older.

Whilst I live through the daily bickering with the little one, my oldest shares knowing looks with me.  Gives in when the threenager targets her, ¨Fiiiiiine, fine, fine....¨ she´ll say in an almost condescending tone and even shakes her head as if she were forty-five instead of five.  It is the comic relief I need, to maintain my sanity, to remember that it WILL get better.  Five, the golden age.

Yes, I have a threenager, a little rebellious person who wants nothing more than to assert her will and negate mine for no reason whatsoever other than to prove that she can.  I remind myself that she needs this phase to test boundaries, to figure out right and wrong, to become a confident independent four year old and angelic five year old.  Mostly I remind myself it is just another phase. Deep breaths, lots of deep breaths, some yelling, some crying (both of us), some guilt for said yelling, for thinking I handled it poorly, for wishing I´d done it better.  And somehow at the end of the day, however it turned out, I always know my threenager is in love with me too, and nothing beats that.  (I know because she follows me to the bathroom and if I lock the door she pounds on it like a 300 lb man til I open it).

Goodbye Winter Break

Hello January! The girls will be going back to school tomorrow and we are all more than ready to get back to our normal routines.  The whirlwind of Christmas and New Year´s and the addition of Three King´s Day this year has been fun but exhausting.  Tomorrow I will drop the girls off at school and head over to the gym to resume my fitness routine (sounds fancy but its not, its sweaty and I don´t much enjoy it, except for Pilates).  After that exercise high, which I´ve yet to experience,  I´ll attempt to get my house in order after which I´d love to meet a friend for coffee before the school run.  Nine to two...five hours, how I´ve missed you!  Don´t get me wrong, I loved spending more time with the girls, loved having the time to enjoy lazy breakfasts and go on day trips we normally don´t get to make.  But oh how many things get put aside, each day that goes by creates another task to the “after the holidays” list. (And let´s not talk about the overindulgences in the food and drink department, save that for another post).  I warn you, this is a long one, making up for my two month hiatus...

These two go back and forth between fighting and adoring each other.  The fighting usually comes from the little one who wants nothing more than to shine brighter than her sister.  Lately I see a shift happening, and suddenly I spy more moments like these.  Talking, laughing, playing...finding their way to the deepest of friendships.  Until the next bickering session, which if I recall correctly ocurred five minutes after taking this shot.  

One of my favorite traditions in Spain is going for a ¨vermouth¨ before lunch.  Usually on the weekend, this is a staple bringing people together to enjoy a  glass of wine, beer, coffee, whatever you fancy while enjoying some pre-lunch tapas and conversation.  We have become fervent followers of this tradition.  When in Rome...

After returning to Spain from the states, one of our goals was to travel more, not only abroad but within our own region.  Soon after coming back, we discovered Llanes, a small fishing village an hour away.  We love it there.  Spent many summer days enjoying its beautiful beaches, some of the best in the north of Spain (in my opinion).   And while we now feel almost like locals, this was our first visit in winter.  Just as charming.  If we win the lottery we´re setting up a summer cottage there, preferably right on the beach, but one of these village streets would do as well.

As per usual, we leave everything to the last minute, and so it was with xmass shopping.  Some key items were taken care of way in advance, but some last minute things always come up.  Heading to our local shopping center the day before Christmas Eve is almost like running with the bulls. This year however some brilliant person in management decided to set up a Beer Fest bar right in the middle of the mall.  Not only that but there was a child play center available for kids to enter for one hour whilst the adults enjoyed this:

Needless to say, shopping was a little less stressful, a little bit more amusing, and a tad more generous.

Christmas Eve 

Christmas Day, coookies have been eaten, milk has been drunk and only a small piece of carrot remains.  Not sure why the reindeer left it on the plate and not on the floor.  Glad no one asked about this.

Selfie time with the littlest before New Year´s Eve dinner with the fam.  There was a war going on between myself and those cute little purple shoes.  She refuses to take them off when at home.  They are hand me downs from her older sister, and so two sizes too big for her.  No objection there.  However after being worn day in and day out 24-7, not only by her but by her sister (who most likely did the same) the smell eminating from them is well, not pleasant.  But I am picking my battles.  Look at that smile...if stinky feet means infinite cuteness, so be it.

Big breakfast on Three King´s Day, this is HUGE here in Spain.   Day of the Epiphany when the three wise men bring gifts to all the little children.  We decided early on that Santa would be the tradition in our home, as well as setting limits with gifts. The three kings do not make a stop in our home, but they leave just a couple of things at Grandma´s...a nice compromise I think.  

After this delicious meal and the lunch that followed, I am quite ready to get back to the grind, back to healthy eating, and back to working on the things I love.

Winter break, its been fun, but I´m glad you´re leaving...see you next year! 

x